My Story

Since receiving my mission call to Leeds, England, I've had the same question asked to me over and over again: Why? 

Why are you going on a mission?
Why are you going to England? Did you want to go there? Did you get to choose?

I did not choose to go to England, I was called to serve there...I am needed there. I know England is where the Lord wants me to be, and I can't imagine serving anywhere else. Thinking about serving a mission began last spring while I was attending Brigham Young University-Idaho. I had a plan to teach English to kids in China through the ILP Program and while I was looking up information for that online, the idea of serving a mission popped into my head. When I was 10, my dream was to serve a mission in Africa. At the time I had flaming red hair, glasses, freckles, and was so white my skin could blind people walking on the street. I wanted to go to Africa...don't ask me why. Now my hair is a duller red, I don't wear glasses, and my skin can still blind people. I am going to England...I think I'll fit in better. However, the idea to serve popped out of my head as quickly as it had popped in. I went on with my boring college life with the hope of going to China the next semester. Gradually, I took my plan of going to China into action. I filled out the application, called the program, started making payments, and receiving donations. My mom bought me new suitcases, I was preparing to defer for fall semester, and I had attended training for my country. I was called to teach in Zongshan, China, and would leave in August. As the semester came to an end and closer for me to leave to China, I started feeling uneasy. I remember one night laying in bed and recalling my feelings to my roommate. She told me those feelings would be normal and soon I would feel excitement. I did my best to push the uneasy feeling aside and wait for that excitement, but it never came. A couple days later I received an email from my mom explaining her feelings on my trip to China. She didn't feel right about me leaving and knew she had no reason to feel that way since everything was going smoothly, but she couldn't push the feeling aside. Since I was being stubborn, the Lord had to go through someone else to tell me DON'T GO TO CHINA. That's exactly what I did. I didn't go to China. I skipped class, called ILP, and canceled my trip. 

For a while I had no idea why. Why would you cancel a trip to China when everything was ready for you to hop on that plane and take off? I now know why. There were a few more times during the fall semester when I tried to plan a trip with ILP for a different time, but nothing worked out. The idea to serve a mission became a daily thought and soon ILP was out of my mind. I think the most profound experience I had during fall semester was when I went to General Conference. I had never been before and getting the tickets to go were a bit of a hassle because there was a possibility we (me and my 2 roommates) wouldn't receive them in time. But we did, and we went (we got tickets for Sat morning session), and it was incredible. The night before the first session, I told my roommate (also best friend) that I thought I was going to serve a mission. I had just turned 20, so I still had a year left before I could leave. I will never forget what she said to me after I told her. I remember staring at the ceiling and just hearing, "I know". She was so sure and so confident I would serve. The next morning, we went into the conference center in our Sunday best and came out with shock and complete joy on our faces. The mission age had been changed for girls from 21 to 19, and boys from 19 to 18. I could leave now. 

It still took me time to decide when I really wanted to leave. I planned for summer, but that ended up not feeling right. Eventually I just said, Ok, lets do this thing, and started filling out my papers. Yet, I still needed coaxing by my lovely roommate to finish filling out my papers. Now, a month later I've started this mission blog. I hope it can inspire others to not be afraid and serve a mission even if it was just an idea that popped into your head. Serving a mission, and deciding to serve are not easy. Without my close friends and family I probably would still be debating whether or not to serve. I know the Lord wants me to serve in England, and if I am faithful and trust in Him, then things will work out in the end. 

The scripture that led me to pray more about a mission and trust in the Lord (now my favorite scripture): 3 Nephi 26: 9-10 
"And when they shall have received this, which is expedient that they should have first, to try their faith, and if it shall so be that they shall believe these things then shall the greater things be made manifest unto them. And if it so be that they will not believe these things, then shall the greater things be withheld from them, unto their condemnation."